ASK!

One of the best things I learned early in life was exactly this: Ask ANYTHING! You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Such a mom thing to say. So you best believe I'll be passing this lesson down to my son, Reece, too. There are only two possibilities. Yes or No. Both come with great life lessons. And if you're faced with a negative reaction or judgement, it is a killer lesson in empathy for other's emotional baggage. So it's a 50/50. And while you might think your chances are slimmer, you'd be shocked how many times a YES is the surprising answer. And let's be real: if you do get a NO that means your closer to your next YES. This past week, a beautiful and unexpected YES came my way. And it's too good to not share.

But before this epic YES, which was my husband's surprise birthday present, I need to share how crazy your asks should be. I've been the recipient of so many wild yeses that it could seem like luck. I've even messaged Will Smith to come to a friend's work event, because.... it's Will Smith. And why not? There was my NO. Ok it wasn't even a NO. I don't think he even read it. But I have had YESES to un-mailable pies being mailed from famous bakeries, airline first class upgrades for free, so many jobs I wasn't qualified to get, ice cream delivered from NYC, mentors taking me under their wing, experts hosting workshops for co-workers and clients, and most recently, a well known pilot making time to fly with my husband.

Ok ok ok. You're here to hear about the epic birthday YES... so let me get to it!

My husband, Jeff, and I had planned months ago to visit Daytona Beach for his birthday. Not only was it going to be his birthday, but our son's and Jeff's father too. It was going to be a week of celebrating so I needed something awesome to give him. Now, if there is anything you need to know about Jeff, which if you know him personally you already know, he is obsessed with flying. Five years ago for his birthday, I surprised him with a discovery flight, which then lead to him becoming a private pilot. It is his passion. You can feel his love for flying anytime he talks, reads, does anything related. He will come home from a crazy day at work and watch airplane ANYTHING. Usually its "Air Disasters".... And I'll protest. Not really keen on watching everyone die in a dramatic plane crash again and again and again. This 10000% doesn't make me want to join him. Or learn. But in true Jeff style, he tells me he's learning what NOT to do so we can be safe. Alright. I guess I accept this. But I don't want to watch it.

So when he's not watching Air Disasters or YouTube channels about plane crashes, he's watching one of three people: Sam Chui, Big Ern, or Lew Dix. So one night after our son went to sleep, weeks before Florida and all the birthday adventures, Jeff was watching a Lew Dix's video while I sat and browsed Amazon (you know you do that too). But when I took a break from price comparing toddler car seats, I noticed there was ocean views from the sky right in front of me. Where was this guy flying? So I asked.... and sure enough.... Lew Dix, this guy Jeff LOVES to watch, flies out of ORLANDO. Freaking Orlando! Literally an hour away from Jeff's parents. So of course my brain starts going 100000000 miles an hour, as all amazing dyslexic and ADD brains do when an idea pops in. Luckily, Jeff thought the mischievous look on my face was about the 5lbs of candy corn I had in my Amazon cart. Could Jeff go flying with this guy on his birthday?!?

Next, a quick google search and I have Lew's contact me page. It's an amazing caricature image of Lew flying. So now I know the kind of guy I'm working with: not taking life too seriously (hell yes- my kind of energy), loves flying (Jeff's energy), and someone who seems down for a good time (I think we are meant to be best friends). One thousand percent our kind of people. I mean, look: Doesn't he look fun?

Now the one thing you might already know about me: I am a MORNING girl. 3am is my time. The best version of Marcy happens early. Therefore night time Marcy is weird. I'm tired, at the end of my bandwidth, and most often not connecting all the dots. But I could not show any restraint or control. I needed to ask. And ask BIG. This guy is BUSY. Not only does he teach students to fly, but he flies privately/commercially, and runs a YouTube channel. So you know the man is not sitting around ordering 5lbs of candy corn. He's got shit to do. So I couldn't wait. I asked. Zero clue what weird stuff I wrote but I do remember promising we weren't stalkers or serial killers.... ya know.... because no one wants to fly with someone like that. Zero proof reading, zero plans. Just wanted to make husbands birthday as special as he is to me.

After I hit send, I kept basking in the idea that I could surprise Jeff with flying, on his birthday, in warm Florida, with someone he admires. It would just be the freaking best. But what were the chances Lew would even have time, or trust a weird ass email from a stranger.... or want to do this? So you best believe when I received an email back, which I saw at 3am, I laid in bed fist pumping the air! Shut up. He was in. I'm already obsessed with this guy and I don't love flying. And we could make this happen? Shit. Now I had to get all the moving pieces to fit together. No easy task coordinating 10 people, on Jeff's birthday, to an airport, with all his flying gear, unknowingly.

Game on. I love a challenge. Especially a surprise challenge. I knew who to call. Allen! Jeff's dear friend and fellow pilot, who happens to live in Jacksonville, Florida. Jeff and Allen are GREAT friends. So much so that any time Allen comes to Maryland, it gets added to our joint personal calendar. So I knew Allen had plans to be in Maryland during our visit to Florida. Dang it. But we could work with that. Onward to my next big ask. I had to ask Allen if he could be part of this fun and then potentially hide his tail number on his personal airplane. This way Jeff wouldn't be able to track Allen's plane and I could tell Jeff early on his birthday that Allen actually is in town and they are going flying together. Which would have been a lie. But a lie to get Jeff to the airport. Allen wasn't down for that. He didn't want to be in Maryland in a business meeting pretending to be flying with Jeff. He wanted to be there to ACTUALLY surprise Jeff. What a ride or die friend! My heart explodes knowing Jeff has friends like this. So Allen changes his meetings and plane ticket and all the other plans to Maryland so he could join in on the coordinating Jeff's epic birthday adventure!! But now we had to get Jeff to the Kissimmee airport. So let me tell you want we did:

On Jeff's birthday he was told we were going to lunch in Kissimmee. We said that this Mexican restaurant was voted best Mexican in all of Florida (it wasn't but what's another lie in this sea of lies on lies on lies) and it was nearly impossible to get reservations, but we got one. (Special thanks to my Dad's fiancé, Sue, who asked her nephew about epic places to eat in the area. He is a legit foodie so he was able to find us a place that would serve as a good cover story). Check. Jeff loves Mexican and driving 1.5hrs for "the best" meal on his bday seemed like something I'd plan. Now, since there were 8 of us going to lunch we would have to take two cars. Perfect! I could leave early and go pick up Allen from the airport. Remember, he flew his personal plane from Jacksonville to Kissimmee just be part of this fun. I told Jeff I needed to leave early because I needed to pick up his birthday present (not a full lie). So me, Kristen (Jeff's sister), and Jeff's father all left early to grab Allen from the airport and get to the restaurant before Jeff and the rest of the family arrived.

No hiccups in any of this! Ok fine... Allen got delayed 45mins for wet paint on the runway in Jacksonville. BUT even with that we still arrived to the restaurant 15mins before the rest of the family. "Surprise Jeff! Allen changed his plans and you, your dad, and Allen are going flying today!" He bought that. He was happy. You could tell he was happy but not really diehard IMPRESSED. And I always IMPRESS when it comes to my Love Language of gift giving. You just wait Jeff.... you just wait. Sooooo I bit my tongue and continued with the unfolding. At this point, me and Lew are texting and coordinating how to link up at the airport. I was able to get the bill paid and done and out the door on time (Impressive because nothing moves fast with 8 people). Also luckily, the airport was around the corner. Simple, easy, fast. So when we pull up to the airport, Lew knows, I can see him walking our way. Before we can even start the surprise, Jeff immediately turns to Allen and said- That's Lew Dix! (Still no clue he's here for HIM). Allen, fully aware of what's happening, says "Is it?" Surprisingly, Jeff actually stops Lew, which I didn't think he'd do. But perfect, let Lew shine doing his thing! So when Jeff stops him to say hi and that he loves his videos, Lew wastes no time saying he's currently recording one and he should be in it. Jeff is totally thrown off by just getting to met Lew, so he is completely oblivious to what's unfolding. Jeff agrees, and I grab the go-pro camera. As they are standing there talking, Lew wishes Jeff a Happy Birthday. Another sign of the surprise right over his head. How the heck would Lew know its his bday???! Jeff is totally out of sorts that he doesn't even register this..... but shortly it all comes together. Surprise Jeff! This is ACTUALLLLLY your surprise! You, your dad, and Lew are going flying!! Byeeeeee! Have fun!!!!

Literal PERFECTION. Jeff has ZERO clue... Even when we told him, I still think he wasn't really sure what the heck was going on. I have never seen Jeff like this. Tangible shock of what is in front of him, and Jeff has worked INSENSE situations in DC during inauguration. So I knew this was literal bliss and fun for him. I LOVED every second. My heart was so incredibly full from Allen's grand gesture of friendship to Lew's great gift of his time and knowledge. I feel such joy from seeing the people I love, and I love Jeff MOST, be surprised and delighted on a level unimaginable. I was so deeply present that I didn't even see/feel the fire ant hill I was standing on.... not until the pain of ant bites were so bad I looked down. No big deal right? Holy hell. As a beekeeper you'd think I'd be used to bugs attacking. Nope. This sucked. And I ended up some serious welts as a parting gift. It itched and hurt for daysssss.

Still worth it. I'd do it again, with even more ants. That's how much I love surprising people with unforgettable gifts.

So today's lesson: be bold... and kind. And the world will surprise and delight you in wonderful ways. I think asking is the best way to gain confidence as well as develop the lens of the world. And my view of the world keeps getting more and more beautiful as I see the goodness, kindness and love humans have for each other.

So I am here to tell you.... Don't NOT ask. Knock that shit off! Ask. Ask big. Do it again and again! Do it to the extreme. Your heart will grow exponentially when you realize how wonderful people can be. Just make sure to be this person to others too! You have no idea how HUGE a small gesture, in your eyes, could feel. Share your gifts. And ask for them too. It is truly what we are on Earth to do!